Friday, October 14, 2011

Getting a little nervous

I'm starting to get a little nervous about my upcoming trip. Just the not knowing anyone at all is big for me. I would really like to be a super confident WOOHOO I'M LEAVING ON A JET PLANE person but I'm more like "crap. I have to fly to get there? AND I won't know anyone once I land?"
So what did I do? I packed. Yup, I'm almost all packed. Weird that that would calm my nerves a bit but it did. I remembered the "liquids" rule this time (last time I flew I didn't and it was a stretch to get my stuff through security), and figured out what I had left to purchase before the trip.
The other bummer is I'm getting picked up at 4:30 am my time. I land at 4pm NYC time and have to be ready for a meet and greet, meaning I have to not look like I got up way early and try really hard to not smell like plane, by 6 NY time. It goes until 8, then I hit the sack because the next day starts at 8 which is really 5am my time. This is going to be one hell of a trip - I can tell you that much already. Maybe I'll be too tired to be anxious!
I'm hoping I get there in time to at least shower if not catch a quick nap before the event. Which I'm nervous to go to because I'm shy. This whole thing makes me go "and what made you think you could do this again? Cause, I forget...". Then I have to remind myself that this is an amazing opportunity and not taking advantage of it would be wrong. I figure that if I can pull this off, if I can get through this, I'm good to go. I think it will be good for my self esteem to get a little boost of 'I rocked my first trip alone' juice. And in reality I'm excited to go and learn everything I can in the short time I'm there.

On a completely different note - I saw my PT yesterday. She's super nice and there wasn't too much pain involved. She talked about using ultrasound on my scar tissue. She said it could possibly help break things up faster but that they had to be sure I wasn't pregnant  because it uses deep heat. I laughed. Hard. Then said as seriously as I could, "No. I'm sure". Then she started laughing so I further explained that anyone who asks me that gets an "are you kidding? I'm here because of what happened last time. 12 months out I'm really really REALLY sure I'm not pregnant". Which made her laugh harder. It was good times.
That question always makes me self conscious, like do I look pregnant or something? I mean maybe I do? Next time you see me let me know, wouldja? Thanks. I know it's probably standard protocol but still...

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